Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Beauty Is Not EVEN Skin Deep!

When my kids were each in 1st grade, one of their assignments was to make a relief map of Texas. You've probably done something similar: you know, the flour/salt/water combo that you shape into various degrees of lumpiness for a three-dimensional model.

That's what my chin looks like.

I don't know how I can be so lucky cursed blessed in this glorious time of my life to have both barnacles of old age and acne that is worse than anything I ever experienced in my teens.

So off to the dermatologist I went this morning to get some drugs treatment.

And yes, while I was there I did tell him what a lovely brochure that was about those barnacles and how that made me feel so special. He laughed and said (1) he didn't write it, and (2) he's had them too so it can't be old age! (He's about 4 years older than I am.)

As it turns out, I have a classic case of perioral dermatitis. NEWS FLASH: Please note that the linked American Academy of Dermatology website says that this mostly affects YOUNG women! Take that, ye olde barnacles!!

The doctor said it's probably caused by hormones. Great. Haywire hormones: just what I need! And it is also probably what is causing my little eye problem to keep flaring up.

So he gave me a prescription for antibiotics plus some samples to start right away and sent me on my way.

Well, almost.

You see, he had a newbie greenhorn resident with him. So he had to explain it all to her. In great detail. And then he said those fateful words.

"You know, I want to take a picture of your chin. No one will even know it's yours."

So out of the room he goes and comes back with the camera, zooms in CLOSE, and immortalizes my relief map flare-up so all his upcoming residents will be able to see what a full-blown case looks like.

And no, I did NOT ask for a copy of the picture.

Forget the egg on my face. I'll just be walking around with a paper sack over my head.

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Anonymous said...

Oh, sweet Lord, how awful! I hope the medicine helps! Did he offer to do an "after" shot?

Xandra said...

Relief map....LOL! That's how I feel sometimes too!


Rhonda said...

You poor thing - I hope the medicine works ever so fast!!

Aging - it's not for wimps!

The Preacher's Wife said...

Oh now, I would have drawn the line at becoming medical research material.

I want an autograph when your face turns up in the AMA Journal.



Mocha with Linda said...

Oh you think you are so funny.

Well, if I'm gonna hang out in the big 'ol blog world with you and 2nd Cup Linda and Vicki and Lysa, I guess I'll have to take whatever book I can get!


Anonymous said...

Oh those hormones!! Girl you crack me up!! Don"t worry this to shall pass:)
Love the picture. . .

The Preacher's Wife said...

In the words of my son...

"Oh, What EV" :))

You know I love you girl! ;))

Alene said...

Sorry! Just checking in on you. Guess I had you on my mind for a reason. ha. The cartoon is just too cute. I feel like that many a day. Blessings girl!

Anonymous said...

I once had a professor in college want to keep on of my papers. somehow, it doesn't seem the same.

sorry. I hope all is clear VERY soon!

hormones. are your eyebrows migrating to your chin too? tee hee hee hee. (like I would ask you if mine weren't).

Anonymous said...

Girl, you are so funny. I'm so glad that we can laugh at ourselves. It makes life more fun. Are hormones a curse, or what? Is there anything they don't affect?

Stop by my blog and weigh in on some questions I put out there. I would love to hear from you.


Lisa writes... said...

Here's how my pastor put it (granted, he is younger than I): seeing our bodies age reminds us that we are dying and to die is GAIN! One day closer, girls, what a glorious day!

He of course does not deal with hormones (directly) or his perspective may be vastly different.

DidiLyn said...

Are you falling asleep at 8ish every night? What is up with that? I used to be able to par-tay all night with the best of them. Now I am nodding away during American Idol. Yikes.
Good luck with your barnacles, matey.

Kelly said...

I love your candidness! You are always a breath of fresh air and so real:)

Linda said...

Some of these comments are hilarious. Well, MochaL, we have yet another thing in common: we have both been medical cases in-point. I, too, have been immortalized, and I can't believe I just confessed that to the world. But I think that's actually a deeper bond than the old blood sisters thing that kids do.

Lelia Chealey said...

Hi Linda,
I love your blog.
I went through this same exact thing!!! One thing that helped me too, is Arbonne's Balancing Cream called Pro Leif just for this hormononal stuff. I love it & I'm a consultant for BeautiControl so you know it's good stuff! :)
OH, the beauty of aging...gotta love it!

Chris @ Come to the Table said...

You totally crack me up! Is the treatment helping?

Sandy said...

Yep I am thinking when I arrive in heaven someday I will want to inquire about the use of hormones in our bodies for women in their 40's!! Oh can I relate. :)
Thanks for the post....it did make my hormone possessed body laugh. :)