The Onslaught

They're coming.

Like the Biblical plague of locusts, brown and green, they are about to descend on us all. For some, as soon as this weekend they will be everywhere you look and walk. The noise will build as the cacophony of their species rises in unity of purpose and speech.

"Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?"

Sigh. Strategically placed in the moment that the fresh motivation of the New Year's resolution might be starting to fade, these are not encouraging words.

Since my daughter is no longer in Girl Scouts, fortunately we're out of the business of selling the things. At least the aroma in my living room isn't tormenting me and cases aren't lining the wall. And I do not have to freeze to death and try to manipulate stiff fingers to count money in frigid temperatures at a booth tomorrow.

But having experienced those "delights" firsthand, it does make it a little harder to just walk right by a hopeful little girl. Especially if it's a quiet booth and she doesn't seem to be selling much. And if she's little - the cute factor of a young gap-toothed Brownie is a definite advantage!

And then there's my man. He's a pushover for these little girls, especially since his girl used to be one of them.

So consider yourself warned. Soon they'll be among us. Prepare for action.

And stay out of my Thin Mints.