Monday, August 4, 2008

WARNING: Birthdays are Hazardous to Your Health

I've had a sufficiency.

I would tell you I'm full, stuffed, sated. Except my grandmother didn't think it proper to talk in such "coarse" terminology, especially at the table. (We're also the only clan I've ever known that calls chicken thighs "second joints." How weird is that?!) So my lawyer grandfather devised an appropriate way for the grandchildren to declare that we had reached our maximum capacity for food:

I've had a sufficiency;
Any more would be superfluous
And prove very deleterious
To my corporal mechanism.

Or, as we eventually shortened it, I've had a sufficiency.

The reason for my "corporal mechanism's" misery? My birthday dinner. Specifically, the dessert:

That would be the CHOCOLATE OREO® MUDSLIDE CHEESECAKE from The Cheesecake Factory, described on the menu as "Chocolate Oreos Baked in our Creamy Chocolate Cheesecake with a Chocolate-Almond Brownie Crust."

In searching for the picture, I stumbled across the fact that one slice has 1050 calories and 71 grams of fat. I'm not sure whether to groan or oink.

I can't believe I ate (almost) the whole thing!

And for you young gals who aren't as old as I turned today and don't remember that classic line from the old Alka-Seltzer commercial, here's a remake of the commercial from my childhood!


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A Stone Gatherer said...

That looks delicious! Too bad you found the calories and fat grams! Sometimes I believe ignorance is bliss! This would be one of those times! Your grandmother sounds like a proper southern lady! I love what you guys say for full!

A Stone Gatherer said...


Smilingsal said...

Yes, I remember that commercial; thank you for giving me a smile to start my day.

Happy Birthday! You really have not a sufficient number as you are not even close to my age!

sara said...

First of all.....second-joint? I have never in my life heard that!! :)

Second, it is 8 in the morning and that cheesecake looks DIVINE!!!

Before I played the commercial, I sang "plop,plop, fizz, fizz, oh what a relief it is.." They left that out of this update!!!

Happy Birthday!

Why 2nd Cup of Coffee? said...

Oh, another year older. It's rough; it's tough, but you're strong enough. And that's my birthday rhyme for you. Second joint? Seriously? Wow. That is a new one, for sure. Sounds like something from the Puritan era. But, it could come in handy when there are middle school boys at your table and any mention of a body part causes all decorum to fly out the window. Happy Birthday to you, dearest Lid. Sending love.

Sarah@Life in the Parsonage said...

Happy Birthday!

And don't worry Linda, I have it on good authority that there are NO calories or fat grams when eating dessert on your birthday. Zero.

PS - I love how refined and civilized your family was...mine are like a bunch of wild animals around the table ;)

Cheryl said...

Happy birthday!!
Don't worry about the dessert, just eat it once a year!

Xandra@Heart-of-Service said...

I'm so glad you had a wonderful dinner for your birthday! Do you know that I've never eaten at or had anything from the Cheesecake Factory? It sounded wonderful though!

Love the poem....


BP said...

Happy birthday! I have never been to Cheesecake Factory! I really want to go sometime.

Chris @ Come to the Table said...

Catching up, getting back into, not just reading blogs from my feed, whatever you want to call it...I have not been commenting at all as of lately. I have missed the interaction. But summer is like this. Anyway,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! I pray you had a blessed day and by the way the cheesecake looks so yummy and I would have eaten every last morsel. ;)

Lisa writes... said...

Happy, happy (belated) birthday, my friend!

Anonymous said...

Chocolate Oreo Mudslide Cheesecake? 1050 calories? 71 grams of fat?

oooo. That'll leave a mark.