Flashback Friday - Sibling Stuff

Do you have siblings? (If not, keep reading - I'll get to you.) How many and are they boys or girls? Where do you fall in the birth order? How did you view your "spot" in the family compared with the others? If you are the oldest, did you resent the things the youngest got to do that you didn't? If the youngest, what did you want to do like the older ones? And if you are more of a middle child, how did that impact you? How do you think your birth order shaped your personality? Did you and your siblings like each other growing up or did you fight all the time? Are you close now? Or at least friends with each other?! What memories stand out about you and your siblings?

If you are an only child, how did you like that? Were you glad to have all the attention or did you want to have a brother or sister? What advantages were there to being an only child? What disadvantages? Which side of the fence is greener?!

For everyone, did your sibling experiences (or lack thereof!) affect your decision to have kids or to have a certain number?

MY FLASHBACK:
I have one brother and two sisters, all older. They were 11, 9, and 7 when I was born. Most of my growing up years were spent trying to be big like just like they were. I generally really liked my siblings, although sometimes I felt like I had two additional mothers when my sisters bossed me! That was a real pain! We didn't have quite the same type of squabbles that siblings who are closer together do, but we could definitely push each other's buttons! I used to drive one sister crazy by mimicking her; even as she was talking, I could figure out what she was going to say and say it at the exact same time. But she deserved it; she made me fall off my bike and still refuses to admit it to this very day!

My brother and I have always had a special relationship. In spite of the fact that he cried when I was born and he found out I wasn't a brother! But he got over that fairly quickly. Which was a good thing, considering my crib was in his room! One of my sweetest memories with him occurred the first summer he was married, when I was almost 11. He took a week of vacation and I went to see him and my then-SIL. She was working and he and I swam in the apartment pool, played endless games of dominoes, and other miscellaneous activities. Looking back as an adult, I realize even more what a special thing that was for a guy who was 22 years old to want to be with his sister!

I was definitely treated as the baby of the family. I wasn't particularly spoiled; they just didn't always tell me everything. (And they certainly didn't let me do everything!) Even when I was in college and my mom had some major health issues, they didn't tell me all the details until a good bit later. So it was a little weird when the baby ended up being the one who cared for our mom in her later years. My missionary sister and I have also had a bit of role reversal as she feels so out of touch with American culture when she comes home that she relies on me a lot.

As far as birth order and personality characteristics go, I'm a strange mixture! I definitely have some characteristics of a youngest child. But I also have some of an only child, because I was in 6th grade when the last of the older kids went to college, so I was the only one at home for a number of years.

My brother and I were really close after my dad died in 1996; he handled all the financial aspects of my mom's care while I took care of the physical/medical stuff. We were a great team. We still have a good relationship but just don't talk as much. Our stages of life are very different. The same is true of my other sister and again, a lot of that has to do with the fact we don't have a lot in common.

I'll always remember an epiphany I had at my grandmother's funeral. After the graveside service, I remember noticing my great-aunt (my grandmother's sister), who was born when my grandmother was 18. My great-aunt was the last living sibling, and it struck me how sad and lonely she looked. I told my family, "I guess that will be me some day." Then I realized what the alternative was and decided, "I hope that's me some day!" The idea that I would bury all my siblings was sobering, but not as much as the thought of being one of the first to depart this world!

I always kinda wanted to have three kids. But my man, who is the oldest of four, just wanted two, and my pregnancies were so miserable that I'm not sure I could have managed another one!


I'm looking forward to reading your flashback! Share your sibling memories on your blog and link up here!

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